First Impressions of Sarah Palin
I just got back from a Smokies backpacking trip to discover Sarah Palin is running for vice president. The first thing I noticed is she looks like Tina Fey. Then I learned her 17-year-old daughter has been knocked up by a "fuckin' redneck," Sarah's accused of trying to fire a state trooper who messed with her sister, she may have belonged to a crazy fringe party that wants Alaska to secede from the union, her husband was nailed for DUI 20 years ago, her kids’ names make them sound like dogs on a sled team, and the McCain campaign’s vetting of her might have been a little lacking. I’m going back to the Smokies now.
Comments
You might pass me on the trails.
Posted 09/02/2008 at 12:30:24 PMTake me with you. Please! Get me out of law school! I'll help pay for gas!
Posted 09/02/2008 at 12:48:51 PMPlease go back to the Smokies and stay there.
Posted 09/02/2008 at 01:10:46 PMEmmett, that was so unexpected and so darn funny!
Posted 09/02/2008 at 04:28:12 PMYou know, I don't really mind white well-off Republican teenage girls getting knocked up as long as they don't have abortions. Bristol is a real role-model for young American girls. I hope she runs for political office one day like her wonderful moose-hunting mother (I bet Hussein Obama has never killed a defenseless animal just for fun in his whole life!). She's already proven her courage at such a young age. Bristol rocks!! (and that hunky Levi! Who can blame her, huh? He really knows how to shoot the puck in the net!)
Posted 09/02/2008 at 06:25:17 PMThe coarse language. The juvenile thinking. This is why the Scene is lost and adrift. Sinking to the muddy bottom in a sea of mediocrity.
Beneath contempt.
Posted 09/02/2008 at 10:02:22 PMAnd so what if when Sarah was mayor she wanted to ban some books from the library and when the head librarian objected, Sarah fired her? Some books need to be banned! The Holy Bible is all you really need. I love this woman more every day.
Posted 09/03/2008 at 05:45:54 AMWell let's see - Obama wants to raise my taxes and Palin doesn't.
That automatically makes her infinitely superior to him right there.
Posted 09/03/2008 at 07:05:06 AMSo contempt is floating somewhere above the bottom in the Sea of Mediocrity? That's good to know. Can you diagram the levels of hell next? I want to pick out my condo.
Palin sucks. Obama sucks. McCain sucks. Biden obviously sucks. We're fucked, America.
Posted 09/03/2008 at 10:34:20 AMGM, as VP she wouldn't be able to have a whit of impact on your taxes anyway, would she?
God Bless America
Posted 09/03/2008 at 10:45:46 AMSo Vice Presidents never have any affect on government policies or actions?
Go tell that to the leftists who continually squawk about the "evil" machinations of Dick Cheney.
And brush up on your civics lessons as well. VP's can break tie votes in the Senate.
Posted 09/03/2008 at 12:18:34 PMI never in my life thought anybody could make Marsha Blackburn seem like an option.
Until now.
Lord have mercy.
Posted 09/03/2008 at 02:58:29 PMPalin is a joke. All the qualified Republicans, and they picked a young female with no experience. Gee, I wonder why? Pathetic. Republicans are grasping at straws. Choosing her is an act of desperation, plan and simple. And you know what, the bulk of the country knows its a joke.
Sorry Republicans, your way of life is coming to an end, and nothing, including the bible, will stop that.
Posted 09/03/2008 at 10:30:54 PM