Because It’s Funny: Guy Pees on Courthouse
When you gotta’ go, you gotta’ go. Just ask George Banks, who simply couldn’t hold it until he got to the public toilets inside the Justice Birch courthouse downtown. Instead, Banks elected to drain-the-main-vein right in the front entrance of our brand new $49 million courthouse last Wednesday afternoon.
He was charged with indecent exposure and (surprise!) public intoxication. We thought about penning some snarky commentary about this, but instead elected to just post the full affidavits from both charges after the jump.
Happy Labor Day!
P.S.: We left the affidavits in their original, all-cap glory.
These affidavits are written by Metro officer Gary Wayne Mcelhiney.
From Banks’ indecent exposure charge:
I RECEIVED A CALL TO THE BIRCH COURTHOUSE, WHICH STATED THAT THIS SUBJECT WAS URINATING INSIDE THE FRONT DOORS OF THE COURTHOUSE. A FEMALE OBSERVED THIS SUBJECT EXPOSING HIMSELF, AS HE WAS URINATING ON THE WALL AND FLOOR.
From Banks’ public intoxication charge:
I RECEIVED A CALL TO THE BIRCH BLDG. COURT HOUSE, WHICH STATED THAT THE SECURITY OFFICERS WERE HOLDING A SUSPECT THAT THEY CAUGHT URINATING INSIDE THE FRONT DOORS OF THE COURTHOUSE. WHEN I ARRIVED I OBSERVED THIS SUBJECT WITH THE FRONT OF HIS PANTS WET AND A LARGE PUDDLE OF URINE ON THE FLOOR. HE ADMITTED THAT HE HAD BEEN DRINKING. HE HAD A STRONG ODOR OF ALCOHOL ABOUT HIM, AND WAS UNSTEADY ON HIS FEET.
Comments
Vein, PJ. Vein.
Posted 08/29/2008 at 03:32:27 PMD'oh! Correction appended.
Posted 08/29/2008 at 05:32:25 PM