Nashville Music Blog

Me, myself and eye: the David Carradine of country music.

​First off, the scene itself is almost too perfectly bizarre. Will Smith and Wyclef Jean are rocking the mic at a Nobel Prize after-party--because of course there should be Nobel Prize after-parties--and there, sitting behind them onstage is...Toby Keith. Who acts like he can't hear the music. And keeps leaning over to someone and saying something. And then finally gets up to take his turn at the mic and...and makes a squinty-eyes gesture when Smith mentions "yellow" people?

Oh, Moby Teeth. To his credit, though, this isn't an easy problem, even for a professional mime. After all, Toby points to Will Smith for black people, and to himself for white people, and when there aren't any red or brown people to point at, he just kind of bullshits that one with a wrist-twirl. But then you can imagine the pressure because he just knows he has to come up with something for yellow people. His mind is racing! Chopsticks? The invention of gunpowder? Or movable type? How do you gesturize that shit? HOW DO YOU REPRESENT ASIAN PEOPLE WITH YOUR ONE FREE HAND IF THERE ARE NONE IN THE ROOM TO POINT AT? Miming a gong hit would be too abstract, obvs, so squinty eyes it is!

Go watch the video at Gawker. And remember, as no less a legend than Pete Townshend once said, All the Best Cowboys Have Chinese Eyes.

(HT: Spurge.)