John Mayer to Play Sommet Center Feb. 10
Excitement around the water coolers of Nashville this morning, as it was announced that, on Feb. 10, the Sommet Center will be transformed into a wonderland of adult contemporary for people too young to like adult contemporary. That's right. John Mayer is coming to town. Concert goers will swim in a deep sea of wankage as Mayer--whose music is the sonic equivalent of pleated pants--rehashes Stevie Ray Vaughan licks over innocuous airy-breathed Top 40, to the delight of college freshmen and their parents. Seriously, let's hear it for pleated pants. Hollaaaaaaa! 
John Mayer knows how to party!
John Mayer's terminally white, "I want you to wanna fuck me, but I don't want to fuck you" balladry, gives me (like any listener of actual music) more douche bumps than an actual douche bag does--and yes I mean a bag literally used for douching, not the colloquial term for peeps like this.
I do have to say Mayer's appearance on Chappelle's Show was enough for me to take him off my list of people I wish would attend a Great White show. Considering that we're talking about a guy who can easily be held wholly responsible for the existence of Jason (Mr. A-Z) Mraz, that's saying a lot.
Since I think Mayer is--despite that "Daughters" song--fit to continue living on this planet, I've got to say I'm a bit concerned for his health. Dude always looks real pale and sickly to me. Am I the only one who's noticed this? Seriously, every time I see him on the moving picture box he's got the eye bags of a guy who just got his stomach pumped after a four-day bender of mainlining heroin, having unprotected sex with prostitutes and railing lines of blow off of fretless basses. Seriously, dude's a baller. Either that or it's just my fantasy that he's the John Belushi of sallow-faced, softhearted, nimble-fingered soft-rockers. See how he looks in person when he returns to the Sommet Center. Michael Franti and Spearhead open. Tickets go on sale Sat. Nov. 21 at 10 a.m. at Ticketmaster. If you've got an AMEX you can get 'em as soon as Nov 16.
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